Press Pencil To Paper And (Insert Keyboard Here?)

Posted: 06/06/2012 by erichblayde in Blogging, Life Lessons, Sarcastic Syntax
Tags: , , , ,

**IMPORTANT BLOG NOTICE THINGY** I think it a good thing to add some more theme to the blog with the introduction of a new weekly tradition “Two-fer Tuesday” (not very bloody original is it) but I am sure you get the concept. Every Tuesday you get a bonus blast of Muttered Musings in the form of a second blog post!(Insert wild applause or screams of terror here.)

Hmmm…thing to talk about, thing to talk about. Ah-ha! Got it! The thing to talk about is talking about things!(Confused yet? I bloody am)

Ok enough scribery of sarcastic syntax. Time to cut to the heart of this pandering to the word gods.

Writing has always been a love of mine but I never dared dream it could be anything other than a secret expression of my inner core scrawled in the countless notebooks that adorn my home.

Enter the wonderful world of blogging.

Personally I was not a fan of blogging in the beginning. For years I scoffed at those who so diligently inscribed their opinions on the pixelated parchment of the internet. I viewed blogging like Facebook, just another boatload of people posting about the incredibly uninteresting Chinese food they ate last night….boring. Then the blogging craze landed close to home

My dad began to blog. Now I must admit I was perhaps predisposed to pay more attention to his writings and vlogings because I absolutely adore him (and he is easily one of the smartest people I know) but something in his work caused me to see that perhaps blogging had a purpose. Not just to tell people about your dog or how you learned to make hollandaise, but as a personal journey that, through the aspect public access to your writings is somehow a different experience than scribbling in a notebook you know no one will ever read. I decided to give this new medium of creativity a shot, created a blog and wrote a couple entries. It was mildly amusing and I got a kick out of seeing the responses people who read those first entries posted, but the world of blogging really did not amuse me. I put the blog aside and returned to my notebooks.

Despite my somewhat raised opinion of blogging I remained steadfastly resolute that blogging was not an arena I would choose to enter for myself. But then life threw me another little curveball.

In the fall of last year the controversy that had surrounded one of my acquaintances (now a fast friend) for the previous twelve months burst into full flower upon the publishing of an article in the local gay paper that was written by my friend in regards to the subject of the dispute. You see my friend is a lesbian and some twelve months prior to the article’s being written, her partner had come to the realization that he is a transexual and wanted to transition. This was hard for my friend to adjust to as she watched her husbutch turn into her husband and she saw her identity as a femme lesbian begin to slip away in the eyes of the public. This is not an uncommon feeling among partners of trans people (watching tue person you thought you knew unfurl a big set of rainbow wings you never guessed the existence of would be unsettling for almost anyone I think) but what was uncommon was that my friend refused to keep quiet about it. She had openly begun blogging about how her partner’s transition made her feel.

The GLBT community has long had its own version of “don’t ask don’t tell”. It seemed an unwritten rule that the partners of trans people were never allowed to speak about their own emotions regarding “the change” to anyone outside of other partners of trans people (and even that was done extremely quietly and carefully lest you misspeak whilst in the presence of the “wrong sort”of trans partner.) This ideology was not acceptable to my friend who decided (rightfully bloody so I think) that she should be allowed to express her feelings to whomever she deemed appropriate to express them to (what is this, like free speech or some other goddamned hippy nonsense?) And so she blogged and talked freely about her feelings surrounding her partners transition. She did not call him down nor attempt to incite negativity against him. She remained (and does to this day) his committed partner. She simply wrote honest, to the point entries about her life and her feelings, didn’t mince words, talked openly to people who had gone through the same experience and (most notably) threw DADT right out the fucking window (which is where any and every version of that horrible restriction belongs in my humble opinion)

Enter a community divided.

Somehow the simple act of one woman deciding to embrace the simple concept of free speech ignited a whole community into furious debate. I actually know of two fast friendships that ended because the parties could not reconcile each others views on my friends expression of her personal opinion (seriously people?!) While I myself was a little unnerved by the prospect of such honesty I remained unequivocally neutral to the whole mess, in my mind while I might not have understood her reasons or made the same choice for myself had I been confronted with the same situation, it was (in my opinion) none of my blooming business. If she wanted to write her blog that was her choice, I wasn’t being forced to read it. If she wanted to talk to people that was her prerogative, she wasn’t trying to talk to me now was she? But my few attempts to elicit any indications of neutrality from those who broached the subject with me were met with snarled curses and accusations of my not being supportive of my community (transgendered people) As far as I was aware my friend’s partner was supportive of the blog so I really couldn’t see where the transgender community came into the flipping equation, but I chose to keep my nose out of it and stopped responding on the subject altogether.

Enter the article that shocked the world.

After a period of controversy my friend was approached by the editor of the local gay paper and asked to compose an article on her choice to speak out and her feelings about partners transition (she is an incredibly talented writer on top of being incredibly controversial :P) I happened upon my friends article online shortly after its publication and, throwing neutrality to the winds, decided to see for myself what all the blasted fuss was about. My astonishment at the honesty and truth in her words was compounded doubly upon reading the comments section of the article and seeing the hatred spewing across the board. I resolved right there and then I was upset and going to do something drastic.

I sat down and read that fucking blog from word one to the end.

Seeing the catharsis of the writing process occurring in someone over a series of coffees or dinner dates is one thing. Seeing that same catharsis in their written words day by day, month by month is entirely another. The enormously positive power of blogging became apparent to me as I read my friends writing that evening.

Perhaps it was the final relinquishment of my prejudice against blogging that opened my eyes but since that time I have seen the restorative balm of blogging heal wounds that no doctor could conquer, no lover vanquish and no positive thinking diminish. And so too has blogging entered my life and provided simple comfort when nothing else had sufficed.

So now, nearly a year after the first softening of my opinion of blogs I can officially say I have a new and fantastic personal policy on such a topic.

It seems to me that the thing to do is to talk about things 😉

  1. Sterling Hilyard says:

    I simply want to say I am just all new to weblog and honestly loved you’re web page. Very likely I’m going to bookmark your blog post . You actually have awesome stories. Regards for sharing with us your web-site.

Tell The World What You Think

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s